Due to a combination of questionable humor value, lazy readership, and perhaps some light complexity, I present the Band Names Answer Key. This is for those of you that are:
a) too shy to ask questions (for fear of looking like a loser).
b) too polite (thinking you'll preserve my ever so fragile ego).
c) just not that interested in the first place.
Anyway, here’s some explanatory discussion.
Answer Key 1 - 10
1) This one is fairly transparent, and unimaginative. Just getting your feet wet with a penis / oral sex joke couched in a food reference. No applause necessary.
2) Putrid is simple, but feel free to look it up if you’re still reeling from this term. Porcelain refers to a toilet bowl (as in “praying to the porcelain god”), and Porridge is another term for soup. Put it all together and you get the not so pleasant consequences of a hard night with too much tequila (or adult beverage of choice). Maybe in the next generation of this answer key, I’ll just post a picture.
3) Nauseous = gross, repugnant, repulsive, icky. You get the idea, I hope. The Favor part is a reference to sexual favors. The song title indicates you need to have a few adult beverages before “going down” on a particular chick (the ‘er = her). Sorry penis fans, this one doesn’t quite work with lick ‘em.
4) “Meat” is yet another penis reference. (Is that getting old already)? The “Donor” part means we’re willing to generously share our dongs / rods / man parts. As for the biographical blurb - we’re not very popular, nor selective. Consequently, we will not be too discriminating about where we put the “Meat.”
5) This is a better version of number 4. Same content, superior execution.
6) This is all about the sound alike terms. Try this spelling on for size – misspent semen. Then for the song title, you can pick whatever dirty word you like that begins with C (generally going for vagina stuff, but the editors asked me to forgo stating the really nasty verbiage in this forum. Yes, I also think it’s hypocritical for them to suddenly sprout some principles).
7) This one fits better in context. Originally I wrote it in response to my teams playoff loss. It’s low on cleverness index, so I’ll let you ask questions on this one if you must.
8) A “happy ending” is naughty massage terminology for getting off (being brought to sexual climax) at the end of a rubdown. Shaving is just the act of shaving, but with a backward reference to the opening act. I incorporate an oscillating head razor (ever so popularly advertised on tv), which in itself I find funny because you can imagine “Oscillating” as a really exceptional twist on oral sex (which “Head” indicates).
9) Sound alike terms – I’m obviously speaking of the verbs kneel and bob, and not the proper names. Yes, here’s yet another reference to oral sex (I really hope you get the imagery, because the editors have refused to let me post a picture). In this case “4 Coin” means paying for it. The song title is admittedly a lame addition. I just put it there for a sense of symmetry. Sue me.
10) This is about knocking a chick up after getting plowed / drunk and making some bad decisions. Could also assume this is from a chick’s point of view – she picked a loser and things went from bad to worse.
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