KIDS
For the health of the game, baseball is, and needs to be, a kid friendly sport. However, if you can’t get your little hellcat to sit still for a slice at Pizza Hut, you sure as hell don’t need to bring him / her to a 3-hour baseball game. Call me anti-kid if it helps you sleep at night. But my stance for any event or location is that I’m not cool with little Chucky screaming in my ear, running up and down the aisle, or wiping his nose on my pants. Unless you plan on spending the bulk of the game at the “super kiddie fun zone,” the trip is going to be a waste of your money (except that 8 seconds worth of “look at me and my baby at the game” pictures). A cheaper alternative would have been a Happy Meal. But that’s fine. I’m cool with you parting with the coin. Your investment just helped finance next year’s free agent pick-up. I primarily resent you for wasting my money, as I become an unwilling member of the village raising your child. I should never have to tell someone else’s kid - “No, don’t eat the bird crap off the seat.” “No, don’t dangle over the balcony railing.” Like a decent percentage of the attendees, I came to watch the action on the field, not listen to you scream futilely at your future inmate. If you can’t manage Damien, get a sitter, come to the game, scream futilely at the umpire, and we can all get along just fine.
Props to Sharp for the contribution
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