Wisdom from the Cubicle Jungle - 3

Businesses have assorted justifications for work cubicles – brainstorm area, space savings, inexpensive production, social accountability, etc. Physically, the cube is a slightly modified version of an elementary school desk. And this description comfortably fits the hierarchical intent and ensuing behavior. The cube dwellers are the incorrigible third graders, and the neighboring office dwellers are the real adults. Born from the careful observations of a novice cube dweller, this series is an attempt to identify the complex rules of the cubicle jungle. Don’t be alarmed if some rules seem contradictory.

11) It is possible to get bored of facebook and youtube, so you must have a healthy set of back up websites to cruise (CNN, People, ESPN, ADNW). And just consider the bonus - you might just impress other cube dwellers with your diverse set of interests.

12) If you worry that your cubicle neighbor may not check your shared social-networking site in a reasonable amount of time, you should verbally tell him/her that you just posted a comment on his/her home page. Then if you still aren’t sure – ask again if he/she sees the comment, wait for the eagerly anticipated laughter, and discuss the content further in person.

13) The longest part of the day is when your screw-around partner leaves for a long lunch and you’re bored enough to do actual work.

14) Wear a lot of gaudy jewelry and jiggle it around with purpose when walking through the cube jungle.

15) If you’re a dude, maximize your creepy factor by slowing noticeably when passing a cute girl’s cube. Feel free to give her an extra careful look-over, while coyly tilting your head to gain particular notoriety.